we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize