saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
