Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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