her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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