He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
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