What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
