Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
