so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
