I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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