she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
