Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
