you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
