1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Randomize
