So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
