his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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