so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
