She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
how drunk are you?
Several
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
