nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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