my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
