Non-Jews are for practice
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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