How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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