Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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