just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize