she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
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