Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
