I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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