So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
