I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i jhust puked up my retainher.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
