Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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