So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize