My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
two words...techno handjob
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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