Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize