I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
