Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
