you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
