we have officially lost it.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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