This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
