i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
