its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
