Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
