I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize