So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
