road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
