$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
