wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
