I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
