i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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