if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
honey bunches of taint.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
