you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Green mimosas i think yes
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
