stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
